Tag Archives: family

BORN IN THE USA, Part 2

WWII Era Bark Print from Tonga, Tonga. Photo by L. Annarino

These war buddies who mourned those buddies who died in combat, and who treasured those who sat with them in solidarity at our kitchen table, shared more than stories. They shared themselves. Mom and I quietly listened, staying in the background, granting them sacred space.

My dad did not collect war trophies. He collected books and papers, which I read and pored over. My favorites were a book telling the history of the USS South Dakota, and one illustrating the flags of every nation. The first spoke of valor and patriotic duty fulfilled by every sailor aboard. The second helped Dad identify incoming planes, separating enemy from ally. I considered this a most useful tool; one I employ to this day, always searching out tell-tale signs of enemy incursion into my life and the lives of others. It may be one reason I eventually became a lawyer whose favorite tool is cross-examination. I am always looking for the “false flags” flown by lawyers, newspersons, politicians and servants of the people. There have been too many lately.

I read Dad’s folder containing assignment memos and his letters of commendation, held his battle ribbons and medals in my hands, marveling at the battle stars gleaming dully after being carried through the war. I have the Tongan Island bark tapestry he bought from the King of Tonga in exchange for a case of beer he hauled from his ship onto the beach where Tongan women were making such artistry.

My father fought his way through WWII. When he finally returned to his Ohio hometown, my pregnant NYC Mom in tow, he had a new fight on his hands. The fight of all first generation immigrants to find a way to support his family, and protect other such families living in pockets of real estate abandoned by earlier immigrants; along industrial-polluted rivers, smoky rail-road tracks, and industrial waste areas.

Dad and his brothers, who had served in the US Army as cooks joined their brother, excused from duty because of tuberculosis, and a cousin; and opened a restaurant. This restaurant was not a food truck as today’s start-ups. No, they found a vacant alleyway between two buildings, put sawhorses covered by planks between the two buildings, collected a grill and started cooking. They hung supplies held by ropes strung between the two buildings. They soon had enough money to add a roof, then a floor. Eventually they had a full-service restaurant a block long and alley-wide with a half-block long bar and side booths. the space behind held two separate dining rooms, a butcher shop, walk-in freezer, walk-in refrigerator, kitchen and dish-wash area, and storage rooms above and below. 

These Italian-American men supported their families; and fed the homeless, emergency workers in the event of community storms, floods, and fires. They cooked for the church and seminary fund-raisers. They contributed in every way they could to the welfare of every person in the community. New immigrants are grateful and hard-working in ways earlier arrivals to our shores have long forgotten. I remember.

My cousins and I spent hours at the Center Cafe, sitting in the family booth or behind the bar talking to our great-uncle with a cauliflower ear about his award-winning boxing career.  Dad hung a boxing bag inside our garage and bought us boxing gloves. I sparred with my older brother and punched along with the boys. As a female lawyer, when that was a rarity, I happily and effectively sparred with boys in and out of court. Sicilian and Italian men love their women and make sure they are safe and can defend themselves. 

Sitting behind the bar selling candy bars for my Catholic elementary school was fun. Dad instructed me to count how many beers a man consumed, and not to approach him until he had had 2-3 beers. He concluded I would sell more candy that way. I always won a prize for selling the most candy. Dad knew how to buy and sell. Living on a salary of $50 per week his entire work life meant he had to stretch every penny to rear 4 children and send them all to Catholic school. We kids all worked from childhood on to buy comic books, ice cream and penny candy. Later, to pay tuition, go to the dentist, buy clothes, books and phonograph albums. We all contributed because we were a family.

The best part of hanging out in the restaurant was listening to patron conversations, especially listening to the men at the bar. All classes of people ate there. Families felt comfortable bringing their children to a place where drunkenness was not allowed. Dad and his brothers knew their customers who became family to them. I watched Dad order cabs and send men home after ‘cutting them off’. He called wives to explain what to expect, assuring them the salary earned that day was still in their husband’s pocket.

I listened to lawyers, judges, CEOs, insurance agents, grocers, plumbers, factory workers, mechanics, gas station owners et al whose faces and voices I recognized because they came every day for breakfast, or lunch, or after-work drinks before heading home. What a cacophony of human behavior and community thoughts were shared between booths and bar. All orchestrated by Dad and his brothers. The music of the masses sang out for all to hear, if they were listening. It still does. If we listen. And we must listen, looking and listening for false flags.

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BORN IN THE USA, Part 1

photo by L. Annarino

I was born 2 years after Dad returned home, after serving in the US Navy. He enlisted after high school graduation. A first generation Italian-American he was un-hireable. He hitch-hiked to the Great Lakes Naval Station with a nickel in his pocket and enlisted. Dad was a brilliant man, one of the first electronics experts. While his ship the USS South Dakota ( the most decorated battleship of WWII) was in dry-dock for repairs after being towed back to New Jersey from the South Pacific, dead in the water after a fierce battle with the Japanese, he taught electronics at Yale. Once the ship was seaworthy, he returned to battle.  

At the Harry Truman Museum a replica of his sister ship, the USS Missouri, is on display as it is the ship where the Japanese surrendered. Dad showed me his firing position inside the cramped and overheated turret. As he continued his explanations his stories drew a crowd, asking more questions. I watched my Dad enthrall over one hundred visitors for more than two hours, offering them a true account of why war is always hell.

Dad first escorted munitions to Great Britain as The US lend-lease effort. Many in the United States did not see the need to oppose Hitler and aid Europe. There was no NATO, nor United Nations yet.They soon learned the short-sightedness of such America First policy when Pearl Harbor was attacked. Dad was there, but the South Dakota was out on training maneuvers when the Japanese strike on Pearl Harbor occurred, one of two ships not damaged nor destroyed that day. Within hours those two ships headed out to the Pacific to engage the Japanese.

As an infant I sat on Dad’s lap as Mom served food and drink to his fellow servicemen returned from war. As I become a toddler, I sat silently at his feet, listening to their stories, feeling their angst, learning their wisdom. As a young girl, I sat quietly listening in the next room. Some Had fought on land, others at sea or in the air. One freed a concentration camp. Others fought the jungle and suicidal enemy soldiers. Dad explained that when the kamikaze pilots attacked by diving onto the ship it was not a single plane but as many as 9 or 10 planes hurtling to the deck during a single battle. He felt like he was on fire inside the turret, as sailors put out fires caused by the crashed planes.

I watched as they placed mementos of their war experience on the table, each with a story.  I recall Nazi helmets, German Lugars, even a Samurai sword. I still have a “lion dog” one soldier was given by a Japanese family who housed him during the American occupation of Japan following the bombing of Hiroshima and Nagasaki. They treated him like a son of the family as they came to know one another. So many lessons learned through these artifacts.

These warriors appreciated that bomb and I struggled to understand how after hearing them describe the destructive force and damage caused by the nuclear blast ( far less powerful than the nuclear bombs we now have ready). They explained that there could have been no surrender without it. They said many more would have died and suffered if the war had continued on. When Americans built underground bomb shelters in case we were attacked by Russia, my Dad said it would be better to die in the attack than survive and suffer the results of nuclear exposure. My Dad told his little girl this. He told me war is always hell. He did not want his children to suffer hell on earth; better that they died immediately.

Such are the difficult decisions made during war. Every single man at our kitchen table agreed there should never be another war. In fact, WWII was billed as “The war to end all wars.” If only, Soon my godfather would be sent to Korea. Later my brother would be involved in the Viet-Nam War. Next a nephew fought in Iraq. Afghanistan after 9/11.  Now, a great-nephew has been sent to The Border in Brownsville, Texas. Other soldiers are being prepared to make war in Minneapolis.  My country has made war on VenezuelaIa.  It threatens war against Mexico, Greenland and Canada. Remember that there was a Japanese delegation in Washington D.C. protesting American tariffs and a trade war between our nations when Pearl Harbor was bombed in a sneak attack. 

It seems I have only ever known war. Yet, I have never known war. War has been visited upon others in my name. Until now. War is now showing its face, if not its full vengeance, in American cities. The Civil War happened before my family emigrated to the United States. I was so relieved my family had never participated in enslaving others. Later, I understood I was participating as policies underlying enslavement continued within institutional racism. There is no escaping racism. It is akin to being an alcoholic in a 12 step program. We Americans, even those with the strongest will and opposition to racism, must fight it one day at time, one step at a time; always alert to the impulse which drives us to use it. Like alcoholism, a drink may be an immediate solution; but only leads to more misery. And such misery continues to be visited upon people of color. The murder of Ms. Good and Mr. Pretti may have finally alerted white Americans to the misery visited upon all of us, when visited upon any one of us.

After Dad’s war buddies left I would question my Dad. I asked if it was hard to kill someone. Watching the war documentaries in between the Saturday double-features at the Midland Theater I could not understand how people could do such evil to one another, especially the death camps throughout Europe. Much later, I learned of the Japanese internment camps in my own country. The mother and father of a friend had been interred in such a camp and described the suffering and loss they had endured, sobbing out stories with great grief. Dad explained how such evil can happen. He told me that it is incomprehensible to a sane person to kill. The method used is to dehumanize the enemy so one no longer sees the person as a fellow human being; not merely someone different, but someone less than human. A German becomes a Kraut. A Japanese becomes a Jap.  A Vietnamese becomes a gook. An Iraqi becomes a towel-head. A Jew becomes a K..e. An African-American becomes a N…..r. An immigrant, asylum seeker or refugee becomes the worst of the worst criminal rapist and murderer. Not just different but less. Now, we have our own concentration camps after our WWII soldiers fought to free concentration camps in Europe. I know what the men at our kitchen table would say. They understood the propaganda that white men are not only superior, and all others are less. The men at our table knew better.

I asked why it took Pearl Harbor for the USA to join the war effort. He explained the appeasement of “old man”Kennedy and Prime Minister Neville Chamberlain failed to assess the true danger posed by Hitler and Mussolini. Kennedy lost a daughter and son to the war; and a second son injured during a heroic effort. I wonder if later he could see his folly. I wonder if Heritage Foundation appeasers can see theirs. I wonder if voters will admit their folly in electing people ready to put their Superior policies into action.

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OCEANS

I could become an ocean

If I unleashed the rivers of tears

Building behind eyes seeing,

Building behind ears hearing,

Building behind a mind

Buried in grief over what I find

Hidden within family and friends,

I thought were of a kind;

Who saw hate and felt repulsion,

Who heard lies and became disgusted,

Who watched inhumanity and scowled,

Who with outrage spoke aloud.

Instead, they smirk and smile,

And change the subject acting proud

To shut down discussion and discomfort at discussing hard truths.

Either they are in avoidance of discord;

Or worse, they approve of lies and hate,

And are simply happy to see hate flourish.

They are not the least discouraged.

I could become an ocean.

Instead, I check my emotion.

I seek to find some common ground.

Impossible when they shut all true conversation with me down.

Is this what pushes us apart,

a river of tears breaking canyon

walls of disagreement apart?

I could become an ocean

Washing them away as I allow

My tears to flow.

Until the valley of tears

Washes hate clear

And silts and nourishes the soil

That love may once again grow.

I could become an ocean.

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ODE TO SISTER ROBERTINE, O.P.

Dominican Sisters taught me in grades 1-12. Sister Robertine was my Latin teacher, but so much more. She was the woman who taught me what feminism looked like. She could outwit and outplay our male principal, the priest who thought he ran the school. He did not. She did. She explained, “It is a man’s world; but, a woman’s heaven. Still, you can make it yours.” When we heard clicking rosary beads (we heard her before we saw her) we knew to stand up straight and behave ourselves. She gave no quarter. I wish I had her photo. I wish every child had a Sister Robertine to love them into goodness and greatness. She has been gone many years but her words still resonate; as she explained, words always do. There were two cornerstones at our grade school read: “You shall know the truth, and the truth shall set you free.” “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom.” Sister Robertine struck that fear in us; then told us only the truth, no matter how uncomfortable it could be.Thank you, Sister!

Words create the reality we fear,

or one in which we can rejoice, and hold dear,

and spend our lives, seeing more clear.

Words have power to describe us,

inflame us, excite us, 

or kill what is inside us.

Words can kill when taken in

by others’ hearts mired

in grace or sin.

Sister Robertine said:

Be careful what you read,

what you see at the movies, or on T.V.

Garbage in is garbage out.

That is what words are all about.

She knew A. I. before it was accelerated

by techno wizards, not the Divine

who works at a slower pace

to afford human-kind much-needed grace.

Sister Robertine said:

Dress how you want to act,

How you hope to be,

how you want to be seen.

You can create each day,

play the part in your own play.

You will soon become 

whom you hope to be.

Dress with self-respect 

and respect you will get.

Sister Robertine said:

only “X” or “BIG X”

when our answer was incorrect.

No rewards nor praise

for getting it right.

Working hard to get it right,

to see it through

was the least we could do.

Our reward for seeking knowledge was integrity.

Our reward for dressing well was respect.

Our reward for working hard was strength.

Our reward for seeking hard truths was character.

We could then write our own play,

play our chosen roll, on our own stage.

We could live lives that mattered,

live lives in which lies were shattered.

We could live in the spotlight of grace and power

to change the world for good, hour by hour.

Like all good teachers, Sister Robertine directed the play.

I am grateful for such a teacher every single day.

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THE AGE OF PRETEND

Photo by Anastasia Shuraeva on Pexels.com

We find it charming, not alarming,

when children pretend.

The young boy child,

towel tied beneath his chin

and spread across small shoulders

waves an imaginary sword high

and suddenly feels bolder;

his power felt from head to toe,

ready to defeat any foe.

The young girl child,

Her American Girl doll in tow,

and dressed for the next chapter

she reads in her book which will show

how she can claim her place

in a world within her safe space.

It is a world of their own.

Children too often feel alone.

Childhood play is a godsend

when the acceptance of fear

is boldly met by playing pretend.

It does not stop at adulthood

when we need  for ourselves to fend

and parents’ efforts subside

as children claim adult pride.

Adults, too, need a reprieve

from threats vaguely perceived.

The woman alone in her bed

seeking a strong chest 

upon which to lay her head,

clutches her pillow instead

to lessen her dread.

She seeks a strong arm

to lessen her alarm.

The man alone on his couch,

in front of the TV, leaps from a crouch 

and shouts with untamed glee

when the quarterback throws free

and the opponent is defeated,

the pass completed.

The victory becomes his own.

At every age we pretend

to overcome what we fear,

what we do not feel strong enough to overcome,

what we imagine might cause unknown harm,

what we cannot imagine we can handle alone.

We are never, really, fully grown.

We fear we shall always be denied

the connected love our hearts need most.

We pretend the pride which allows us to hide.

What if, we stopped pretending?

What if we reached out for community?

What if we sought requited love in unity?

We live in an age of pretend.

When and where will it end?

Photo by Polesie Toys on Pexels.com

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MY FELLOW AMERICANS

MY FELLOW AMERICANS

I hold my tongue.

It takes strength I do not have.

Whimpers escape

On shattered breaths,

In silent screams.

The fight worries my soul,

Battle weary and choking,

On words held tight inside.

Once the scream begins

I doubt I could stop.

I wait for your speech.

I yearn for your promise

To stop the authoritarian

Who has taken over our house,

Emptied its vaults,

Stolen its wealth,

Sold its power

To the highest bidders.

So, I write. That I can do

While I wait for you.

To me, this nothing new.

Do you believe me now?

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4TH.OF JULY, 2025

Photo by Brendon Spring on Pexels.com. Read the full text of THE NEW COLOSSUS, (partially quoted below)by Emma Lazarus and inscribed on the Statue of Liberty in New York Harbor.

Today is my funeral.

I have always been myself.

everyone else was taken.

I had become a fossil.

So many layers of sediment

have built up over time

that I

am hard as rock.

Too soon

It has become 

too hard

to remain human.

Especially, when monsters

roam the earth with heavy feet

in lockstep with one another.

They stand atop 

the crumbling rock and pray.

They say

that they

are God’s representative

on this dying earth

to show all the way

to greater days.

We were already pretty great,I say.

I thought we were stronger than they.

I thought they could not

make me, me, me ! their prey.

Yet, on this day we celebrate my birth,

I die during parades

of those who march behind 

school bands playing my songs.

A Statue of Liberty drone-scape

dots the night-time sky

above Red-White-and Boom

crowds cheering while immigrants die.

De-naturalized, de-refugeed

de-citizenized.

No irony there? 

How can the crowds

not realize I am dead.

They are cheering at my funeral.

After all is said,

I am done.

Too few mourners attend.

They have been forced to hide.

Even the Fourth Estate

has crumbled before my eyes,

its voices silenced, 

without enough pride nor ratings

to turn the tide of my demise.

Perhaps it is a Celebration of Life

which once was, but is no more.

Can you bring me back from the dead?

Can you resurrect what I stood for?

“Send these, the homeless,

tempest-tost to me, I lift my lamp

beside the golden door.”

You can still speak these words.

you can still act on my behalf,

on behalf of liberty itself.

This. This. This! I sincerely implore.

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DADDY DEAR

ANGELO ANNARINO,SR. WITH DAUGHTER LOUISE

Sitting at my young Dad’s knee

with thoughts swirling all about me

I had to know what the larger world

was trying to tell me, and help me see.

Daddy, daddy, daddy dear,

lend this little daughter your ear.

Why do they call Japanese people Japs?

Why do they call German people Krauts?

Why do they call Italian people Dagos?

Why do they call Arab people Towel Heads?

Why do they call women Cunts?

Why do they call Viet-Names people Gooks?

Why do they call African-American people “N”?

Why do they call Jewish people Kikes?

I do not understand, but it feels bad.

Sweet girl, my Daddy replied 

with a glance and shrug quite mortified.

In the military I learned the reason why.

It is enough to make a grown man cry.

But, I shall tell you the reason why.

It is hard to kill a fellow human being.

It is easier to kill someone you do not see

is as human and wonderful as you and me.

It makes it easier to harm, and wound, and kill.

It is easier to demean, and hate, and impose our will.

Undocumented refugees become “Illegals.”

Asylum seekers become “gang member criminals.”

Confucius said presciently, “The ordering of society

begins with the rightness of words.”

Republicans 2025 say, “The destruction of society

begins with the wrongness of words.”

FOX “news” is not news at all; 

yet, keeps too many in its thrall.

Karoline Leavitt tries to make us believe

good questions allow her answers to deceive.

Pam Bondi investigates her own untruths,

accusing her accusers of being uncouth.

Kristi Noem prances and dances before the gates

of concentration camps, seeking a date?

Such liars are pretty, dainty and sweet.

Americans, especially young men, fall at their feet.

How do truth tellers compete?

The jousters of old travelled from court to court,

making jokes of despots’ overreach without harm.

No dungeons for jousters in the good ole’ days.

Now, the jesters are banished from dinners to honor

newspersons dedicated to uncovering liars and lies;

and Amber Ruffin’s scheduled comedic performance

is suddenly, fearfully, cowardly cancelled.

Truth now lives in the dungeons, walking there

willingly, and blind. Such willfulness rankles.

When the words are removed and truth set aside,

it is easier to harm, wound and kill 

without losing one’s pride.

How proud will we be when we realize 

we killed our country to save our pride?

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LITTLE AGITATOR,WHY? BECAUSE!

Louise Annarino, J.D.- The Little Agitator, age 2

Do you recall a nickname from your childhood? Perhaps what your mother called you, how she referred to you? What does it tell you about yourself now? Where do you feel it ? Can you find the love within it? Or, was it something that calls your identity into question ? Can you find humor in it? Or at least make peace with it ?

My Mom had 2 ways she frequently described me, called for me, referred to me. She told me and others I was her “Little Why-Because”. It was frustrating for her to have a daughter who questioned the “why” behind every order, demand or simple request. A daughter who could not accept a simple answer to why night happened.  Who persisted questioning every response, such as earth and sun rotation, with the question, “But, why does the earth rotate? and why around the sun?”. Her final answer was inevitably, “Because.” And, my final question was always, “But, why ‘because’?”.

The second nick-name and descriptor she used to define me to myself and to others was her “Little Agitator.” At first I was clueless at this description, for it seemed to upset her. The only agitator I knew was in the washing machine. It seemed to be  a wonderful thing because it helped make our clothes clean. I was flattered until I understood she did not intend to flatter me. Yet, it still seemed a fine thing to be. It challenged the dirt of lies and unkindness.It challenged the bullies in our neighborhood. It kept my brothers in their place. It seemed boys and men constantly picked apart girls and women. Agitating them seemed a fine way to clean up that mess. I became a stronger agitator with every effort to set thinks right.

So, despite fearing being an agitator in attempting to clean up the life and lives around me, I embraced the role. Despite exasperating family, friends, school teachers, professors, priests ( I was thrown out of religion class twice) and nuns by asking “why”, I relished the discussion and discovery in challenging the status quo. 

Being both a “why-because” and an “agitator” was a helpful combination. I was not a “know-it-all’; but, a “I know nothing so explain it, and you, to me.” Once I understood the place of conflict or hurt, I could agitate to make it better. Agitation alone is not enough to set things right. First we must take the time and ask enough questions to truly understand the need for change, and how to fix things without causing more pain.

American leaders in all walks of life are so focused on making money and attaining power they have not taken the time to ask questions and get to the final “because.” Why do we need a Dept. of Education? What does it do? Why do we need Social Security, SSI, Medicare and Medicaid? What do they do? Why do we need Affirmative Action, diversity and inclusion programs? What do they do? What messes have we Americans made? How do we clean them up? Why do we need courts, laws and regulations? What do they do?

You see my point. What is happening to our country now is an abomination. Elected leaders in the former Republican Party (now a dictatorship in the making) have never taken the time or made the effort to truly see the American people because they have not cared enough to do so, not cared enough to ask, “Why?” Their only concern is how can they reduce cost so we can give tax breaks to the wealthiest Americans we hope emulate. We look for scape-goats to explain why the “big boys” do not share with us, while we watch the crumbs from their table blow in the wind. Cost-cutting is a ruse because the Republican Administrations have repeatedly increased the national debt, while Democratic Administrations have repeatedly reduced the national debt. The tax cuts now headed our way will only increase the debt. The firing of government employees and dismantling of the watch-dog programs will only increase corruption and the national debt, as money disappears into the pockets of private contractors planning to take over education, the military, law enforcement, the postal service, health care and social services. Privatization introduces profit motive which increases costs, and provides greater investment returns for the wealthy who are being excused from tax burdens. Our middle class has been under a destruction plan since the 1980s. It is now coming to fruition. There cannot be a democracy without a strong middle class.

We need more agitators, asking more questions.

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EVERYTHING IS POLITICAL

Everything is political.

Every thought, word and deed

propels us at top speed.

Day in and day out,

hour after hour,

to reach for our power.

Children wield power well,

if unknowingly.

They use it incessantly

from womb to tomb.

Dust to dust

politics is a must

to thrive, indeed to just survive.

Politics is the skill to find a safe way

to live another day.

Deplore it, if you will.

Ignore it at your peril.

Feel free to laugh and play

while others guard your way.

Until others stop,

until they drop

all pretense of care

while you have been unaware

their needs have taken center stage

and your insistence

turns to resistance

to their formerly hidden rage.

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