Tag Archives: fear

BLIND EYES

FLOCK SAFETY camera and sign reading WARNING: AREA UNDER CONSTANT VIDEO SURVEILLANCE & LICENSE PLATE RECORDING. FLOCK SAFETY SYSTEM IN OPERATION.
A solar-powered Flock Safety camera overlooks a city sidewalk beneath a prominent surveillance warning sign.

So enamored of myself am I

that I do not see you

though I look you in the eye,

all sincerity belied.

When I face you so confidently

the only one I see is me,

reflected back clear as can be.

Every charge I make against you

is really my confession.

I speak with such aggression

to hide all fase impressions

lest you take the time to think.

I use the fear I sense you feel, 

reflected back at me,

in a never-ending loop;

which only makes me more afraid

to ever acknowledge you.

I must seize your power for my own.

It is the only way I can survive.

I can only live my life 

if I steal yours

Your life or mine?

There is but one answer.

It is why you take my side.

It is why fear makes you hide

any conscience you once knew.

I will always be watching you.

I love watching myself.

All narcissists are blind; you see.

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TAGLINES

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My dreams have taglines; colored lights forming words,

scrolling across the bottom or the top 

to awaken a sleeping brain.

Sometimes, bold sentences 

within thick-lined boxes to draw attention.

My tired body sometimes fails to notice or understand  

the insights my vivid dreams demand.

As I dreamt last night and viewed my last scenes 

a box appeared with a message to be gleaned:

TO GO FORWARD IT IS OFTEN BEST TO LOOK TO THE PAST 

WHERE YOU HAVE BEEN BEFORE. 

And, then, I awoke to my here and unformed now 

wondering what part of past 

informs a future built to last.

Dreams leave clues like any good mystery.

Dreams fragment history.

Dream introduce me to strangers 

who tell their stories, and not my own.

I wake confused yet excited to explore 

the fading dream some more.

I turn on lights to brighten the dark morning, 

awaiting a breathless sunrise 

to seep beneath shades hiding the night, 

which might bring surprises to my door.

It is difficult to see a future

when these days are so dark.

Dreams tell me to see clearly

my future relies upon seeing my past.

I search each dark corner

with a flashlight in my hand.

If I can see what brought me here,

where I now wonderingly stand,

I can see a future brighter than indignation,

more solid than fearful imagination.

A future where strangers’ stories become my own,

and I can grow from seeds I have sown

in the dark soil, now,

so well known.

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MONEY, MONEY, MONEY

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Money counts for nothing.

It has no intrinsic worth,

these tiny bits of metal

dug, then foundered from the earth.

Money adds no value to our lives.

Its value lies outside its cost to self.

Its only value is what it tells us.

Money talks after all.

It tells us what we truly value,

whom we raise up, and whom we let fall.

We bet our future on its use,

or bury it in secure vaults.

We use it to boast about greatness

while it hides our basest faults.

It buys the things around us.

It buys the myth of our safety.

It serves to remind us

we are nothing at all;

but, tiny specks in a universe

among many millions just like us,

trying to rise while gravity pulls us

around and down giant black holes. 

Money fools us, a tool that uses us,

while we think we rule over others

just like us.

So, we gather it as best we can

to show we are better than 

our fellow woman or man.

We cannot rely upon our own souls

to bring wisdom, love and life,

to end the useless strife.

We buy bullets instead of bread.

We drop bombs instead of supplies.

We destroy earth instead of fear.

We believe our own and others’ lies.

Money becomes our grand prize.

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CONSPIRACY THEORISTS

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They are not fooled 

because they lack intelligence.

They are not fooled 

because they lack information.

They are fooled 

because they lack imagination.

It seems incongruous,I know

That those so 

easily fooled by conspiracy theories

stay seated among its mythology 

without questions.

No hands raised to learn more. 

No efforts made to discover

if the storied message 

could actually be other

than what they are told.

Such power games are very old.

Conspiracy theories require

nothing more than dull acceptance

to feed damaged egos on fire

while living half-lives

which must be fueled by ire;

lulled by lives so dull

they cannot imagine why.

They are too eager to create

false safe-spaces 

to guard what life they have left;

where little is required

of those half-alive,

except blind acceptance

of the true thieves

who stole their missing half

long ago.

Now, blaming others.

They have no imagination

left.

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GREED

Despite what we have been told,

money is not the root of all evil.

Money is neither good nor bad,

It can be either warm or cold.

But, greed, that nasty fellow

eats away at heart and soul.

Puts self above the common good,

turns courage into cowardly yellow.

Shame finds no home among the self-serving.

Enamored wealth sets its own pace,

sets purposeless and questionable goals.

The weighty stacks of greedy acts is unnerving.

Senselessness rules its theft of compassion.

Ignorance shelters the ruse of satisfaction.

Depravity sets up cruel games of distraction.

Fear, baseless fear, becomes the sole passion.

Greed can become the ruin of us all.

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BE NOT AFRAID

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As the first female attorney to advise the white males controlling the institution I worked for I understood the underlying hostility that colored every conversation. I sensed the fear of most of those men, fear of a female with power. At one meeting with 3 levels of administrative authority needing my legal advice regarding a personnel matter, I summed up the position our institution faced and explained the necessary actions needed to avoid liability. I asked if they understood and they nodded “yes.” I picked up my file and prepared to leave, raising from the long table around which we all sat with the words, “I shall leave you to it, then.” 

One man directly across from me sneered and said with derision, “You’re  a cold bitch, aren’t you!” I paused, slammed down my file folder and leaned into his angry face and replied, “Yes, and I worked damned hard to get this way.” I smiled “good-bye, gentlemen” and left as a single man applauded me, to my surprise.

I have been called a communist, a pinko, a flower-child, a “n” lover, a socialist, a racist, a bitch, and worse (use your imagination or locker room references) since my late teens while I sat-in, went on hunger strikes, marched and protested racism, war, sexism, ageism, homophobia, classism, unfair tax relief for corporations and unearned wealth, privatization of hospitals-schools-infrastructure-roadways-anything originally financed by laborers’ taxation and turned over to privateers. I watched this agenda progress in the name of conservatism (talk about turning truth on its head)to utility grids, farms and farmers, schools, universities, the internet and other technology, our immigration system…even NASA. 

I learned that calling  me names was a projection meant to distract others from the goals of the Republican Party on the rebound after Nixonian corruption was exposed. Nothing new really. Ask the Native Americans and those enslaved by greedy Americans whose self-interest always overcomes the common good. Call me any name you want. I welcome it. Bullies always go a step too far and say too much when we stand up to them. They look and sound like the fools they are. Be proud of the names you are called. You are getting our nation’s true enemies and worst game-players to show their hand.

“We have nothing to fear but fear itself.” – Winston Churchill

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ODE TO LINDSEY GRAHAM

Senator Lindsey Graham speaking at a podium with a microphone during a press conference
Senator Lindsey Graham addressing the media at a press conference in Washington, D.C.

How does one honor the dishonorable ?

Whose deeds and words were  unfathomable?

Not while he lived to injure and harm,

stepping on humanity to reach the stars.

It was always just part of his charm,

which gave him power to praise and assist

acts committed by others,

as he laughingly followed along.

Then, he died.

The rules change as custom required.

Speak no ill of the dead, 

as if evil deeds, too, expired.

How do the tears rent in our nation mend

if we must simply pretend

He was all goodness and light.

Such a memorial I cannot attend.

Who am I to judge? Imperfect in every way.

Silence is golden on a day like today.

He tried to do good, in his broken way.

I cannot offer false condemnation nor false praise.

I can simply write an ode to death’s malaise.

Finally, finally able, to continue to pray

for a soul laid to rest, as our struggle against hate continues.

Perhaps he can finally find love in his new venue.

This is all I can offer. This is my best.

Now, lay this flawed human being , like all of us, to rest.

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LEAD WITH THE HEART

Lead with the heart

and the mind will follow

a path of peace and hope,

strong enough to carry

dreams and generosity

for all those you meet.

No matter how difficult

the journey it will not be taken

alone, silently, fearfully.

The heart knows best what matters.

The heart knows the best path.

The heart unites us joyfully.

The heart beats life determinedly.

The heart overcomes strife.

Lead with the heart and do your part

to create a world worth living.

Some paths are famous and large.

Some paths are unrecognized and small.

Every path matters to those

who walk it and make it their own.

Every path converges as we move

into the great unknown.

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THE AGE OF PRETEND

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We find it charming, not alarming,

when children pretend.

The young boy child,

towel tied beneath his chin

and spread across small shoulders

waves an imaginary sword high

and suddenly feels bolder;

his power felt from head to toe,

ready to defeat any foe.

The young girl child,

Her American Girl doll in tow,

and dressed for the next chapter

she reads in her book which will show

how she can claim her place

in a world within her safe space.

It is a world of their own.

Children too often feel alone.

Childhood play is a godsend

when the acceptance of fear

is boldly met by playing pretend.

It does not stop at adulthood

when we need  for ourselves to fend

and parents’ efforts subside

as children claim adult pride.

Adults, too, need a reprieve

from threats vaguely perceived.

The woman alone in her bed

seeking a strong chest 

upon which to lay her head,

clutches her pillow instead

to lessen her dread.

She seeks a strong arm

to lessen her alarm.

The man alone on his couch,

in front of the TV, leaps from a crouch 

and shouts with untamed glee

when the quarterback throws free

and the opponent is defeated,

the pass completed.

The victory becomes his own.

At every age we pretend

to overcome what we fear,

what we do not feel strong enough to overcome,

what we imagine might cause unknown harm,

what we cannot imagine we can handle alone.

We are never, really, fully grown.

We fear we shall always be denied

the connected love our hearts need most.

We pretend the pride which allows us to hide.

What if, we stopped pretending?

What if we reached out for community?

What if we sought requited love in unity?

We live in an age of pretend.

When and where will it end?

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INSOMNIA

Sleep catches me unaware

Reading in my chair.

A loud noise as a commercial airs

Awakens me from nightmares.

No, it is the news that intrudes

On waking dreams sharp and crude.

I have been awake more than I knew

Unable to tell what is untrue or true.

And so, I read some more

Of an entire reality to explore.

I try hard to understand and accept

A new reality in a democracy kept

Captive without due process of law

Which exposes all of our flaws.

Racism breathes deep and still

With a long-ignored strong will.

We too easily pretend

it has nothing to do with us, my friend.

Lie once and it becomes then

easier to lie again and again.

And we have lied for centuries now.

Shame beads sweat on every brow.

Cognitive dissonance

Makes us create distance

From truth, facts and connection.

Shamelessness offers protection.

Too many are willing to deny

What is clear to the clear-eyed.

I see no end in sight

And remain sleepless night after night.

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