Tag Archives: grief

OCEANS

I could become an ocean

If I unleashed the rivers of tears

Building behind eyes seeing,

Building behind ears hearing,

Building behind a mind

Buried in grief over what I find

Hidden within family and friends,

I thought were of a kind;

Who saw hate and felt repulsion,

Who heard lies and became disgusted,

Who watched inhumanity and scowled,

Who with outrage spoke aloud.

Instead, they smirk and smile,

And change the subject acting proud

To shut down discussion and discomfort at discussing hard truths.

Either they are in avoidance of discord;

Or worse, they approve of lies and hate,

And are simply happy to see hate flourish.

They are not the least discouraged.

I could become an ocean.

Instead, I check my emotion.

I seek to find some common ground.

Impossible when they shut all true conversation with me down.

Is this what pushes us apart,

a river of tears breaking canyon

walls of disagreement apart?

I could become an ocean

Washing them away as I allow

My tears to flow.

Until the valley of tears

Washes hate clear

And silts and nourishes the soil

That love may once again grow.

I could become an ocean.

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MY FELLOW AMERICANS

MY FELLOW AMERICANS

I hold my tongue.

It takes strength I do not have.

Whimpers escape

On shattered breaths,

In silent screams.

The fight worries my soul,

Battle weary and choking,

On words held tight inside.

Once the scream begins

I doubt I could stop.

I wait for your speech.

I yearn for your promise

To stop the authoritarian

Who has taken over our house,

Emptied its vaults,

Stolen its wealth,

Sold its power

To the highest bidders.

So, I write. That I can do

While I wait for you.

To me, this nothing new.

Do you believe me now?

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LAST BREATH

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What is the period of mourning

when a nation dies before our eyes?

Not in sudden cardiac arrest,

not like a slow cancer.

nor a natural aging

of its body politic.

But, like a chronic illness

which has worsened over time,

sometimes in remission

allowing hope to remain alive.

But, when death’s grip pries

the life from every cell

which protected a nation from demise

and its heartbeats accelerate

at a far too barbaric rate,

what then? How can hope survive

when our national freedom dies?

The violence, the bombs, the rubbled ruin 

comes after the next election, I fear. 

The election may save us from loss

of freedom, but at a cost.

Like Ukraine, we can take a nation back

by electing constitutional, loyal leaders

and set our enemies off to the side.

Like Ukraine, our enemies will regroup

and ferociously and physically attack

what they could not seize by stealth.

They will never let go of power and wealth

which we allowed them to take during this

DOGE-dealing, Heritage Foundation steal.

Courts may save us for a time.

But, be prepared.Everything is on the line.

And the mourning is ever-ceasing

for those who see the fate

of a nation which for too-long

embraced its power and its wealth, 

and allowed itself to hate.

Slavery was our original sin and set the stage

for all the other hate and division

that has led to this time of fear and outrage.

How long is the mourning period for such a loss?

It has been my entire life; yet, my hope has endured.

But, my body senses death at my nation’s door.

And, I fear I simply cannot take it anymore.

What is the end to this period of mourning?

Every cell in the body politic is warning

that this nation, our beloved nation

may be close to its last breath.

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FREEDOM HAIKU

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A collective grief

has settled over the land.

Only time can heal.

We  may never know

nor fully understand why

our freedom must go.

We must be the heart

of miracles yet to be.

And bring freedom back.

It is ours to seize

from its darkest journey and

bring it back to light.

Courage is our friend.

Struggles are not the end, but

A new beginning.

And just like that, friends,

the weight of grief rises up.

Grief comes to an end.

I yearn to see you

happily and truly free,

breathing liberty.

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POST-ELECTION 2024

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My sorrow does not come

from the loss of an election.

Sorrow bubbles up and pulls down

faith and hope and trust in

legal and constitutional protection

for the progressive direction

we moved, pushing hate aside,

within the blue bubble 

where I reside, 

within a gerrymandered state

full of Christo-fascist pride.

Court protection is now

too often set aside.

Criminal leaders with immunity

can now act with impunity

to destroy an entire nation,

indeed a  free world.

Greed acts with such speed

to push grace and care aside.

And truth is destroyed

by incessantly repeated lies.

My sorrow does not come

from watching my nation die.

It comes from watching

fellow citizens kill my beloved nation

Right before my eyes.

And the worst part of it all is,

that it is not a surprise.

I have watched a predator party

stalk us creatures of democracy

my whole life.

The day I most feared 

is no longer just a nightmare.

It is the reality of imminent strife.

I cannot simply smile and reach out,

asked to shake hands with voters

with blood on their hands,

when I want to shout “traitors!”

I think of all who died to protect

and defend my country, my best friend,

I cannot stand to watch cruelty up-end

a nation now at-sea, afloat on lies

that all is at is has always been

after an election.

The desperation of a nation

tears at the soul within.

The soul of each and every American,

until America is dead and buried,

so that rich oligarchs can feed 

their need for power and control.

Citizens United has long been on a roll

to knock down all opposition,

and watch weak Americans fold

their cards and lose their last hand.

Such sorrow, I fully understand.

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REGRET

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When even words hurt

too much to write on a page,

it is time to stop.

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GRIEF

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Everyone grieves in their own way, so they say.

But, steadfast Grief remains the same.

Lips once tilted in joy, Grief holds tight with the strain

of holding back anger and keeping screams at bay.

Grief tightens the brow and hardens the eye

to hold back the tears which threaten to slide

tearing apart all that we hold deep inside.

Cheeks held too tight crease 

and create runnels where tears may glide.

Grief clutches jaws held fearfully tight.

Once tears escape, will our held-back sobs fight

with a pulse so strong they can never be stopped?

Like a street thug, Grief pounds us into submission

and never takes time to ask our permission.

It pushes us down with pummels fierce and powerful.

Grief uses its bruising punches to keep us sorrowful.

We lie on hard pavements praying for the end to our suffering.

We feel we are losing our grip on reality.

We clutch at old truths, begging help to appear and lessen our sorrow.

Even Grief grows tired over time and lessens its blows.

Help comes when we unclench jaws and scream,  

and shout, and let our tears and fears outwardly flow.

Soften the eyes. Relax the brow. Let the tears flow. 

Tears wash away sorrow that new faith can be planted

in every tomorrow, with new ways to love

and new paths to follow.

Signs of grief always remain in new lines

that furrow about our lips, across the edge of our eyes,

and on necks which will, henceforth, our heads tip

slightly down, with greater humility, a bit.

Over time bruises heal, muscles grow stronger.

We learn we can handle the tough thugs who sit

on the sidelines, hidden in shadow.

We learn love again, embracing those who came to help.

We learn faith again, embracing those who prayed by our side.

We learn hope again, embracing those who helped us to our feet.

We stand again on loving, faith-filled, hopeful feet;

and, find a new path where joy and laughter can leads us.

We see our new selves in the eyes of those we pass.

We are stronger and last longer than Grief ever could.

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HAIKU

WEEPING WILLOWS

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Sadly drooped willows

like sorrowful young widows

cry into the stream.

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GRIEF LINES

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Grief lines drawn on the face 

by makeup artists focused

on the performance 

about to begin,

and by newscasters focused

on upcoming election days.

We are all waiting for

the next series in the show

to begin, hoping for 

some sense of normality

or at least civility.

Futile hopes of a naive audience.

The actors know the full story

most of the time.

This time, even the actors

are in the dark and the stark

script writ long ago

has never been fully released.

We are left waiting for the text,

for the action on the screen,

for the performance on the stage

set up to demand allegiance

to characters unworthy

of our attention or our votes.

Many have left the theater.

Many stay glued in their seats

afraid to leve untended

those about to be misinformed,

undermined by underhanded

writers of fascist scripts

meant to remove the final

obstacles to final call

for insurrection and destruction

of America.

I need no grief lines drawn

on my brow.

They are placed there by the tears

I shed as the rule of law is replaced

by MAGA judges put in place

by Republican scriptwriters

to disgrace a constitution fully drawn

and now being dismantled

one case at a time.

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NO CRY ZONE

Another morning when tears overcome words,

and grief buries deeper with each breath.

Each breath a bonus for those of us

not being shelled, shot or bombed to death.

Bullies have breached the constraints

put in place for decades as a restraint

on their worst evils which now cross borders

bringing fear, chaos and disorder.

I weep in the face of Ukrainian faces distorted

by anxiety, terror, confusion and disbelief;

suffering while begging for help, contorted

in pleading and nobility of spirit, 

brave faces on a brave people insisting

we join with equal courage their effort to persist

in the face of evil based on lies

which twist the story 

of a war threatening Russia’s former glory.

And we who hear these pleas seem too fearful to reply,

to breathe deep enough

to reach high enough

to push hard enough

to save Ukraine

and ourselves.

What we are told to justify holding our breath

must be far worse than we can imagine,

bad enough to keep planes and pilots grounded

as those on the ground in Ukraine are pounded;

as we watch with breath catching and hitching 

in tearful wonder at Ukrainian bravery.

I want to fly, not cry. 

I want to spread angels wings

across the sky.

I want to stop Ukraine’s suffering.

I want a no cry zone for Ukraine.

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