This is all I know.
First, you come.
Then, you go.
This is all.
I know.
I know.
It is all I can know.
Yet something shows
from hidden places
up and below.
Something unbidden
that hints at more, longer;
that feels better, stronger.
Where does more come from?
Where does more go?
Where did I come from?
Where shall I go?
It is never enough
this life that I know.
This is all?
Can this be so?
I want to know.
I want to know.
I want to know.
Filed under POETRY
Prayer has been cheapened by the times.
We avoid the pews where fools recline
and bow their heads to fake news
while making money off government grants
for mega churches which promise service
to the poor and neglected,
the hungry and disaffected;
yet, vote against every effort to create
a more humane and equitable State.
And, where women fall for the line they are Eve
and evil to want sex
without admitting how complex
the use of birth control can be
when science is ignored and derided
that men can have all decided
in their favor. Their can be no life
when no egg is released to be indoctrinated
by men of the cloth who refuse to be sated
in their own desires. Instead, women are mired
in deceit and forced to bear the loss of self
to men’s control, if they want to feel blessed.
Enough of this unholy state
which calls on God’s will to compensate
for their failure to mirror God’s true grace.
Prayer has been lost amid the fray
of those who still kneel to pray
to overcome others who fail to tow the line,
and pay politicians to do their will.
Too many souls have learned to be still
while lies are told and children instilled
with false ideology and true evil;
and their very lives lost to thoughts and prayers
cheapened by the politics of fear.
The path to Heaven has disappeared
as we live through hell right now, right here.
Filed under POETRY
It is easy to become disillusioned
with institutions which we know,
and which have gotten us this far,
when we see the mess we are in.
So, what do we do? Organize anew?
And create institutions to do
what we have always done.
Does anyone believe our churches,
companies, and governments
were created out of hate?
Our newly formed groups are not new.
It is always the same.
Each tries to do its best, the best it can do.
The first rule of any group or institution,
like the first rule of each individual,
is to survive, and hopefully thrive.
Membership dues, costs and fees
keep each institution alive.
And money corrupts with greed
to be more, have more, do more.
It seems to be a human need.
As usual, we see the angry diatribe renewed
against religions and governments
for what they have failed to do.
I ask, what do you do?
How many soup kitchens do you run?
How many hospitals have you built?
How many roads do you maintain?
How many times have you failed
to do your best, and ignore the rest
of us? We are only human.
Should our institutions be better?
If so, then so must we be.
Love is not a verb, but an action word.
Love helps us feel the way to act
better than we ever knew we could.
Love erases the word “should”
with the act which rebuilds
institutions of which we can once again be proud.
Tearing down is much easier, I know,
than rehabilitating the world
wherever we are, wherever we go.
Find your hammer, whatever it is.
Mine is words on a page.
Grab some nails and form a crew.
The whole world is depending
on me, and, on you.
Let us rebuild, not tear down
what worked so well before
it became what we chose to ignore,
and let rot
under the weight of heavy storms.
Filed under POETRY
untitled women
work the fields
ply the streets
rock the cradles
cry and weep
unnamed tears
forgotten smiles
un-styled hair
weary feet
arms akimbo
grace denied
homeless
but not heartless,
mores the pity,
where none resides
beside the curb
where hope dies
as titled women
simply pass by
and by
and by
and by
Filed under POETRY
Too loose the covering over her hair
enraged the men who could not bear
a woman’s power of feminity
threatening the control of their masculinity.
It is not women they fear, is it not?
But their dissatisfaction with their lot.
Too weak to accept the challenges they face
they blame women for their own disgrace.
Powerful men stand side-by-side,
partners with women and feminine pride.
Only the cowardly weak attack women.
How do we find love enough to forgive them?
They ought to worry as they fight in the streets
against those who refuse to accept defeat
of human rights and freedom of choice,
and the right of women to raise their voice.
Mahsa Amini! Remember her name.
Iranian women, and men, her courage we claim.
Filed under POETRY
This Sunday the garden is my cathedral.
Where I can kneel un-masked
among hostas and ferns
and turn my gaze upon Creation,
Third person of the Trinity
Who sows the seeds of Christianity
Buried deep with the Second
in the fertile soil of the earth
prepared by the First,
Master Gardener of our souls.
I contemplate Second’s rising
as I ponder the resurrection
of every living thing that grows
after a long winter of cold and snow.
What prayers are these I offer
in the pantheon of gods of long ago?
The prayers of an immune-compromised
Catholic unable to sit among
un-masked rows of worshippers
kneeling in too-few pews
listening to the Good News
spoken by priests within brick and mortar,
while I kneel in the open-air garden.
My communion is deep if incomplete.
I sign the cross and sigh,
breathing in the energy of the Trinity,
which keeps my soul alive.
Filed under POETRY
I never felt so small before
Tiny dot in a universe of stars
viewed on a clear night
as i looked up at the sky.
This, this I know.
But not this smallness
of heart, and mind, and soul
discovered in the face of war.
War I always fought.
War I always sought
to end and make no more.
And not just war over borders
against peoples and nations;
but war against colors of skin,
war against sexual orientation,
war against religion,
war against women’
war against children.
The list goes on and looms large,
larger than I can cope,
destroying all hope.
I never felt so small before.
I struggle to find a way to do more
than put words on a pages
while all around me uncivil war wages.
I never felts small before.
Filed under POETRY
The Lost Soul
There is no place of safety;
no where to run or hide.
I buried pride a long time ago
beneath the snow of cold hearts,
torn apart by fearful rhetoric
and unsung praise,
a dire malaise that yearns
for all it can learn
of love despite the risk
of loss. I would toss out
the loud mouth lout
who risks discovery of
my presence,and stay silent
if I could,but I cannot
stifle the scream of words
held in check lest they
terrify and distract
from the solution to
dark pollution of a soul.
Where is the Light?
Where is the Peace?
Where is the God
who created the innocence
now lost,perhaps forever?
War changes all.
Filed under POETRY
There is No War on Women,By Louise Annarino
There is no war on women. What we are watching play out is an age-old phenomenon of men who fear women’s sexual expression. Whether it is the Taliban, fundamentalist Muslims-Jews-Christians,or Mike Huckabee, the chastisement and need to control women springs from men’s fear of loss of their own control. I refuse to allow their fear to become my burden. I suggest they learn to handle it all, as I must handle my own fears. Their fear, their loss of control, is not my problem; but, they insist on making it so. I don’t call that a war. I call it fear mongering.
We use the word war too loosely. We enjoy hyperbole because it grabs our attention,holds our imagination, and allows us to believe we are heroes(another word used too loosely)fighting some grand battle. Anyone who has ever experienced war is insulted by this cavalier use of the word. Anyone who have ever acted heroically is appalled by its frequent use in today’s lexicon. As William Tecumseh Sherman who marched on Atlanta destroying all in his wake said in his address to the Michigan Military Academy in June 19, 1879, “You don’t know the horrible aspects of war. I’ve been through two wars and I know. I’ve seen cities and homes in ashes. I’ve seen thousands of men lying on the ground, their dead faces looking up at the skies. I tell you, war is Hell!” (Battle Creek Enquirer and News,Nov.18,1933). I cannot use the word “war” to describe anything but war. Fear is not war; and, unless we name what is happening correctly, we cannot address the problem we face correctly.
This fear of male loss of control when faced with female sexual expression has biological roots. http://www.webmd.com/balance/features/how-male-female-brains-differ Men’s brains are structured with less ability to maintain rational thought while in the throes of emotion. Of course they fear women whose brains allow them to cry,laugh,orgasm and think at the same time. Whom should we blame for this? The Hebrews tell a story of the first man and woman, Adam and Eve, in the Garden of Eden. Most of us have at least heard that story a time or two. There are two elements to that story: obedience to the male deity transferred to obedience to the first male, Adam. Who was to be obedient to these male prototypes? The woman. What do fig leaves have to do with the story? They are used to cover up human sexual expression, and thus control sexual expression which becomes sinful when the woman does not obey the man. That is what is going on today!
The Hebrews were not the first to tell such a story. Earlier cultures and religious traditions acknowledged the power of female sexuality; some accepted it and used it as an avenue to spiritual awakening a la the Vestal Virgins. Others fearfully suppressed it, a la female genital mutilation. We see vestiges of these practices today throughout our world. It is not only Mike Huckabee and Republican men who fear women. Democrats,Libertarians,Independents and a host of other men do, too. The men who do not fear women are able to trust and appreciate women, able to understand the biology of male/female differences without feeling inferior, and able to see diversity as an enriching experience,not one to be feared. There is that word “diversity” which too many of us fear. Such men exist within all political parties and religions.
Although I do not see such fear of women as merely a Republican issue, one must acknowledge that the Republican Party platforms have opposed Affirmative Action,our ONE effort to practice diversity; while the Democratic Party platform has embraced diversity.The Republican Party platform opposes women’s right to birth control and abortion,to freely manage her health needs to freely express her body’s sexuality; while the Democratic Party has embraced a woman’s right to choose how she uses her body sexually and how to protect her health. We cannot ignore that these two party positions are different, even though men are the same biological creatures, dealing with the same fears in both parties.
As a woman,I am not satisfied with the behavior of men in either party. It is not enough to add women to the mix, when the men make all the final decisions, and too often ignore and disparage our female voices. When women’s only strength comes from a separate women’s caucus, whose leaders are the strongest and wisest and most experienced political activists I know, rather than being hired into positions of political power we know we still have a long way to go. We may have “come a long way baby”,finally being allowed to participate in the race; but, the race officials-funders-judges are still men who too often control our political expression. The words men use to describe their view of women is not the problem. Their fear of women’s full and free use of her power is the problem. Huckabee apologists are busy trying to reframe how to control women as if male manners need fixed. Instead, they should focus on facing their own fears and finding their courage in the face of female power and sexuality.
Filed under COMMENTARY, POLITICS
annarino writes 
Walking in Grace, Louise Annarino,9-27-2014
WALKING IN GRACE, Louise Annarino,9-27-2014
Being human is terrifying. Being aware carries the burden of striving to be correct. To err invites injury to ourselves, to those with whom we share the planet, and to the planet itself. We also fear others who err; and even more so, those who would do us harm. It is a scary world we live in, internally and externally. And yet, living in this the world is such an amazing experience, majestic and breathtakingly beautiful. Our world is of such beauty that we transcend our fears most of the time. How we do so is both delightful and comforting.
We laugh. What a gift. Laughter dismisses fear to such an extant that some of us lose muscle control and “fall down laughing”, making ourselves totally vulnerable to all the scary stuff we know surrounds us.
We cry. What a gift. Tears reduce us to a molten mass falling into one another’s arms with no fear of retaliation or control by the other. We are most vulnerable when we laugh and when we cry. Yet, these moments are often our most memorable, and most satisfying. These are moments of grace.
We can chose to live in grace,even when we are not experience the comforting joy of another’s comedic safety net for our fears, nor the calming security of another’s embrace. We can choose to live in grace when everything around us shouts “danger.” Living in grace allows us to transcend fear. I refuse to be afraid. I choose to live in grace.
When I was a prison social worker I worked in a women’s maximum security facility housing inmates whom society so feared that our courts locked these women away. Visiting those locked into the most restrictive cell block, maximum security, was discouraged. This short-term lock up was to isolate a particularly intractable inmate who had behaved too violently to remain within the general population. They were not permitted to leave the cell for any reason. They were left alone for days or weeks. As a social worker, I believed such an event was a “teachable moment”,when I could perhaps break through the bravado and masks of an inmate who normally would not welcome my company or conversation.
These women in max were starving for human contact. Thus began my frequent visits to max. The first day, the single guard on duty did not know what to do with me, having never received visitors before. But, he unlocked the corridor door and accompanied me to the first cell in which a woman from my caseload was locked up. After about five minutes of standing by the door he asked how long I would be. “Thirty minutes” was too long for him to stand around so I suggested he let me into the cell and he could then go back to his seat. His eyebrows shot to his head as he suggested to me it was not safe. I asked the woman, “He thinks you will hurt me if he lets me inside alone with you.Will you harm me?” After a short pause to consider, she said,”no.” The guard then locked me into the maximum security cell and I told him I would call him when I was ready to leave. After I left that cell, women from other case loads called out my name as I passed by asking to speak with me. I visited every woman in max that day and every few days after. The guard and I followed the same protocol each time: lock me inside, then come when I call to let me out.
The moments I spent locked into maximum security with the most violent offenders in the prison were moments of grace. We shared laughter and tears. We explored the pain and fear that led to the violence. I tried to “always leave them laughing,” and living in grace.
The write-ups for violence on my caseload diminished and extinguished. I was called in for a discussion with the Associate Director and charged with being too permissive. How else to explain why the women for whom I was responsible were no longer getting into trouble? Another bone of contention was my crisis intervention strategy. I had instructed my caseload to yell out “Call Annarino!” whenever they were about to become violent with a guard or other inmate, instead of letting the violent feelings flare into harmful words or actions. Before long the guards knew to call me and everyone waited somewhat peacefully and guardedly, until I arrived. At which time, I explained everyone involved would get a chance to tell their truth without interruption. I dismissed the usual onlookers hoping for a good fight, promising to stop by their work or class site later to fill them in on what happened after they left. This substantially reduced the risk of group pressure and blustering bravado which often led to mass violence. Once only the critical participants were left, the preaching the truth was followed my mediated conversation.
It did not occur to me that armed guards would find it embarrassing for a 22 year old woman weighing 102 pounds could protect them from harm with mere words. Just before I lost my job, I was told my job was not to empower inmates but to treat them as the “dog chained up in the back yard: when they howl, shut them up.” Instead I had given them a voice. It did not seem to matter that their voice was calm, peaceful and truth-seeking rather than violent curses accompanied by physical attacks. They had learned to live in grace, which seemed to scare people even more. This is the power of non-violence. When we let go of fear, we find truth and the truth is what sets us free.
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Filed under COMMENTARY
Tagged as civil rights, grace, law, love, mediation, prison, religion, social work, teaching, women