I live
in the shadow of my
self,
a dark reflection
of what I once was
but will never be
again.
In the silence of pages
left unturned,
amid the heartbeats
of fearful
resilience
and courage
yet untested.
How it will end
holds greater power than when.
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Thank You Public Servants
The clock reads 3:18 am. I lie in bed swallowing a muffled scream at a final unexpected jolt from a nearby lightening strike. The first time this night I awoke from the storm I checked the time. It was 1:28 a.m. The storm resounding with heavy thunder, and lightening strikes scorching the air has lasted a full 2 hours. The urge to look out the window and check the nearby homes drags me from bed just as I hear the sirens of Worthington’s firetrucks. I watch the lights reflect off wet buildings up on High Street, surprised when they turn onto my street. The pumper truck stops in front of my house. Is it my own apartment building which has been hit by lightening? No, it is that of my neighbor across the street. The kind lady in the delightfully periwinkle blue house with storybook trim she tells me her daughter hates is inside. My urge to run and help seems overwhelming. I know I will be in the way so settle for getting dressed. I am ready for I know not what.
The fire personnel are pounding on her front door shouting so loud I hear them clearly through my windows, “Your house is on fire. Everybody out.” A moment’s hesitation then a cracking sound as they force entry. Firemen push into the house. The glow of flashlights show their progress through the darkened interior as smoke billows overhead. A burnt smell and smoke’s essence hang in the air amid the showering droplets of rain. Thunder continues to rumble in the distance. The sound of the engine pumping water to the hoses being dragged from the second truck, across the lawn and into the house beats a steady rhythm. Flashing truck lights pulse at the speed of my heartbeats, wounded and warmed by the sight of so many brave fire personnel rushing to protect my neighbor, her home and our neighborhood.
All I can manage is to get dressed, while they manage a very dangerous situation, weighed down in hot and heavy protective gear, moving in darkness to find the source of the fire and extinguish its power to destroy. “Such love that they are willing to lay down their life for another,” I think. It awakens my soul even as my body longs for a night’s rest. How grateful I am for Worthington’s fire and police who guard us at their own peril in the dead of night when our fears are so close to the surface and we seem so alone in the world.
It is now 4:08 am. There are 6 trucks on our street and flashing lights around the corner onto High Street. Obviously more than a single company responded to the fire. Community is too small a word for where such dedication lies. Humanity more fully defines it. These public servants define humanity. They remind us we are not alone, but part of a larger human community. I wonder anew at the public and legislative attacks (never forget SB 5) on our public workers whose only purpose is to be there for us, to keep public services available at all hours for every small mundane matter, and for every middle of the night emergency. These men and women are servants to our community. Let us remember them when we vote; not just when we vote on tax levies to support emergency personnel, but to protect their right,and the right of all of our public workers to unionize,to seek fair wages and benefits, safe and sound workplaces, and human dignity. Let us not only support them; but, let us never support those who attack them. It is now 7:33 am. A single truck and its crew stands guard, ready in case the embers from last night’s fire rekindle. The charred hole along the roofline of my neighbor’s home testifies with an acrid odor the threat which still lingers. Yet, we feel safe because our servants stand guard for us as we go about our day.
Thank you,good and faithful servants of the Worthington community,and our humanity.
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DAVE
DAVE
4-2-2013
Louise Annarino
Too often poems
fall out of my eyes
washed onto my cheeks
by tears of joy
or sorrow.
Joy to have known you
in shared sinew and bone
with a long history
carried in common DNA
and family name.
Sorrow at the loss
of a future of mutual
knowing,sharing,caring
for those whom we both
love……………always.
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HUNGER, Louise Annarino
HUNGER
Louise Annarino
4-23-2013
I hunger
for bleu cheese and gazpacho
in a chilled glass
on a hot day
after mowing the lawn,
cutting tart scents
from dry sod,
inviting rain
to keep it green, and alive
like my love for you.
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The Portrait,By Louise Annarino,4-7-2013
The Portrait, By Louise Annarino,April 7,2013
Walking through the festival my eye was drawn toward remarkably vivid paintings of several persons whom I had seen while walking though the crowd. Each was gently holding an item in his or her hands,as if offering it to the onlookers,a gentle smile lighting each painted face. Each painting was different; each deeply stirring.
It was then a man approached to explain his wife was the artist as he pointed her out to me. She was busily painting the image of the man standing before her as he told the story behind his selection of the item and its importance in his life. I felt drawn to his story as his smile widen with each sentence, settling into the gentle smile I had noticed in the other paintings. The artist had a unique ability to capture the light within her subjects as they revealed themselves to her.
The artist hung the painting to dry alongside the others,and shook hands with her subject as he turned to re-enter the throng of festival-goers. Suddenly, she turned to me. “Let’s do your portrait. I shall come to your house tomorrow to paint you. Pick out an item you believe best allows me to paint the story of your life,”she said. She added that I could have more than one item. I agreed to be ready when she arrived the next day, inviting her and her husband to stay for dinner.
The next hours were spent looking around my apartment,rifling drawers and closets to discover the one item which would tell my story,define the purpose of my life,and leave a lasting impression after I was dead and gone. It was a difficult search.
I saw my high school diploma,my bachelor and master degrees and my law degree hanging on the wall; the corded tassels from each graduation cap hanging over door knobs.It occurred to me that these were portals to a life well-lived;but, not the life itself. The same could be said for the photos of my family and all of those whom I love, the last menu from my family’s restaurant and its photo which hang above my kitchen sink, the crucifix hanging in my living room above the statue of St. Francis of Assisi which I made so many years ago before faith had been so battered,the awards for racial awareness programs I had started, and political activism photos.
As I searched I discovered dozens of items I could have used. None was sufficient; some more photogenic and “paintable” than others. Interestingly, I came across items left by others in my care for storage and safekeeping. These surprised me most of all. I had no idea the limited space in my closets had been given over to the lives of so many others. Certainly, they could not be used in the painting.They did not tell my story.
By the time the dream ended, I had found nothing to hold in my hands, or too much. Clearly, I was not ready for the artist to begin painting. Thank goodness I awoke then. I do not know what I would have done should the artist have come to paint my final portrait. I am still searching for something to hold in my hands,something which will show the viewer what my life meant, who I was, what I had to offer. I am curious. What would you hold in your hands should the painter arrive to paint your portrait ?
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Social Security Is Not The Problem,Hombres, By Louise Annarino,3-9-2013
Social Security is Not the Problem,Hombres, By Louise Annarino,MArch 9,2013
This week,I watch the machinations of Washington with a jaundiced eye and pained heart wondering how lunches and dinners between enemies can end in anything other than a poisoned outcome. The fix to social security is simple. Several pieces of legislation recently introduced in the House and Senate would extend its full solvency far beyond the needs of the “baby boomers” and long-lived seniors expected in our future. Yet, Republicans insist it is causing our deficit problems and must be cut, and retirement age delayed, to avoid any tax increase to the top 1% of this country.
This reminds me of the scene from an old western: outside the saloon a group of hombres with drawn guns shoot at the feet of the sheriff to make him dance, just for their sport. Cowards and bullies displaying their power and control over the town’s population. These disreputable shooters were usually financed by the richest land-owner in the area. This iconic scene always makes my skin crawl. It makes me want to lift my skirts and run them down, shoving their faces into the ground.Are you with me?
Social Security has a $2.7 trillion dollar surplus. It has contributed $0 to the government deficit.It is not used to calculate current debt.It can pay out every benefit owed for the next 20 years,after which most baby boomers will be dead. It is the most successful social program in our country’s,maybe the world’s,history. It has made poverty in old age rare (less than 10%). It is safer than anyone’s 401K, as the latest Wall Street bust just proved beyond a doubt. Young workers should applaud it,not fear it.
Democratic Senators Reid,Leahy,Boxer,Franken,Blumenthal,Whitehouse and Klobuchar have introduced a legislative fix. “Under their legislation, those with yearly incomes of $250,000 or more would pay the same 6.2 percent payroll tax already assessed on those who earn up to $113,700 a year. Applying the Social Security payroll tax on income above $250,000 would only affect the wealthiest 1.3 percent of Americans, according to the Center for Economic and Policy Research. Social Security officials say that simple change would yield about 85 billion a year to keep the retirement program strong for at least another 50 years.” http://vtdigger.org/2013/03/07/sanders-reid-defazio-introduce-legislation-to-strengthen-social-security/. Senator Sanders and Representative DeFazio have introduced similar legislation to simply remove the cap on $250,000 payroll assessment.
This legislation would assure Social Security benefits continue unabated COLA increases each year. Chained CPI is NOT a fix;it is merely a means to reduce future increases and decrease income levels for those who rely on Social Security as their sole source of income. As it now stands, the COLA increases are often absorbed by the increases in medicare deductions. Chained CPI would only make this travesty worse.
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THE BALANCE OF POWER AND COMPETITIVE COMPROMISE,By Louise Annarino,12-27-2012
THE BALANCE OF POWER AND COMPETITIVE COMPROMISE,By Louise Annarino,December 26,2012
Politics has often been called the art of compromise. Too seldom do we admit politics is the art of exercising power. Congress cannot exercise the art of compromise when the balance of power is so uneven. Our focus at the moment is solely on the failure of congresspersons to compromise on several levels;between the president and Speaker of the House, within the House, within the Senate, within the Republican Party between Teapublicans and Republicans. We should instead focus on the lack of balance within our congressional districts. Until we right that balance, no compromise will be possible. Continuing the dialogue solely on the personal assessment of individual character illustrated by a willingness or unwillingness to compromise hides the real problem.
In 2010 the Republican/Teapublican victories brought control of the legislature of many key states, in some cases a veto-proof majority. And, 2010 placed more states under the leadership of Republican governors and secretaries of state as well. The 2010 census allowed these states ,including Ohio, to redistrict an imbalance so severe that Ohio’s districts were gerrymandered to form safe seats for both parties. The inability to compromise is the affirmed in these gerrymandered districts. Secretaries of state redefined vote counts within districts,further assuring veto-proof legislatures.
Rep. John Boehner (R-OH) has no motivation to seek the middle when doing so will have no impact on his re-election in a general election. His seat is safe thanks to the recent redistricting legislation, and Ohio’s failure to overturn that legislation in the 2012 campaign. His threat comes from within his own party;and, not just for his chairmanship, but for his re-election. The threat would come as a primary challenge;one well-funded by the moneyed interests and super PACS supporting the Teapublicans. Tacking to center, seeking compromise, would encourage such an attack.How can he seek compromise?
We must organize around redistricting,and other legislative changes which upset the balance of power for both parties. For example, there is a well-financed effort by Teapublicans to demonize the electoral college,to eliminate it, or change how Ohio calculates electoral votes. Republicans are mounting a quiet effort to change our current system to one which favors the minority of Ohio voters. Now Republicans have more safe districts than Democrats do and they want to allow each district to cast electoral votes based on district wins, rather than casting all of Ohio’s electoral votes for the candidate who wins the majority of all Ohio votes, as is current law.
Republicans realize this could give them short-term gain.However, their control is not absolute and eternal. Should Democrats gain control, the Democratic Party could benefit just as unfairly. But, both parties should be more concerned about the good of the people; not the good of any party. It behooves both Democratic and Republican voters to insist that our legislators create more balance;not less. Those of us who believe in the platform and values of the Democratic Party should not fear such a balanced approach. Democratic candidates can compete with Republican candidates, and can win even in unsafe districts. How much better could we do in competitive districts? And, if John Boehner’s district were competitive, he might gain more political power through compromise than obstruction. That would be a win-win for both parties, and for the American people.
We have overlooked the importance of what happens at our local and district levels for too long. we have been trained to keep our eyes on the federal government,thus national elections, as the source of our failed compromise; when,in fact, competitive compromise begins within our own districts. We cannot sit back until the next presidential election, hoping to elect persons who promise to compromise. Everyone wants to compromise when it maintains their balance of power;but without such a balance, no one can afford to compromise. Not Mr. Boehner, despite his fine character and personal wishes…unless he is willing, and we are willing to watch his failed re-election as the price to be paid. Would that be a win for Ohio or the Teapublicans?
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SIGN UP ON DASHBOARD
Dashboard is the brand new organizing platform for President Obama’s 2012 campaign—everything that happens in a field office is mirrored on Dashboard. When new users sign up to join Dashboard, they are connected to their local neighborhood team, allowing online activism to translate into offline activism. If you do not already have an account, you should sign-up by visiting www.dashboard.barackobama.com.
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Removing Cataracts,Louise Annarino,7-24-2014
Some lessons are worth learning more than once. This is true of the lessons learned from my recent and first cataract surgery. I expected that the cloudy view of the world from my left eye would be replaced by a cleaner and crisper field of vision. What I did not anticipate was the amount of light which would permeate my new, unclouded lens. When I close the left eye darkness descends. My right lens is simply grimy, eroded and covered by the detritus of all it has seen over 65 years, like a sheer curtain keeping out much of the light. I had no idea how darkened my world had become, the curtain’s descent was so gradual.
My house is so much brighter, even on the cloudy days we have been having. I don’t need more lamps or brighter bulbs, as I had thought. Light reflects from the softest, most absorbent surfaces, not merely from mirrors. Candle light does light up the dining table enough to see the food on my plate. I had forgotten how much light there is in the world. How bright a future can be. I expect even more light after my second surgery.
It is not until we open our minds and hearts, are willing to open new doors, bravely step out into unknown territory, and curiously step into unexpected experiences that we realize how limited our lives and how clouded our thoughts have become; and, how dark our futures seem.
I thought I enjoyed my garden. I had only known half of it. There is no dearth of bees as I had thought; their tiny bodies now gleam against the backlight of flowers, more colorful than I had imagined. Tiny bugs move soil around the base of each plant, opening tunnels for rain water to reach roots. I thought reading had become burdensome. I no longer struggle to pull words from the page; they leap off onto beams of light straight to the retina. I thought my skin and hair had grown dull with age; but, they glow from the energy speeding through my body, alight with oxygen and sugars to grow new and younger cells. I thought the future could only grow darker. I was wrong. The future always glows brighter.
I dreaded the first surgery, terrified it could leave me blind, or with even less vision. I feared my body might reject the new lens, or my body would suffer an allergic reaction to the medications used to make the surgical procedure physically and emotionally comfortable. My worst fear was that I would not be able to hide my fear. I feared I would have a massive panic attack, causing havoc for the dedicated caregivers working so diligently on my behalf. I feared letting them down and shaming myself.
These are the fears I carry in my bag of tricks. They sometimes keep me from bravely opening my heart, stepping into new territory, and exploring unexpected experiences. When I was young the bag of fears I carried was nearly empty, so light I barely noticed; certainly not so heavy it stopped my explorations of the unknown future. As I grew older the bag grew fuller, heavier and more burdensome. No more. I dumped out the bag’s contents this week! The more light let in by my cataract surgery, the lighter my bag became. I cannot wait for my second surgery. I know I learned this many times before; but,some lessons are worth learning more than once.
If only each of us could remember this lesson, unload our bags of fear, and open our hearts to each other. If we could open the closed doors which block us from one another and step bravely into each other’s lives with light and hope instead of fear…I can only imagine how exciting and enlightening that would be. I am so glad I had this surgery. If anyone tells you that you need cataract surgery, don’t hesitate to say, “Great, I am ready!” The truth is is we all need cataract surgery. Some lessons are worth learning more than once.
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Tagged as aging, cataract surgery, change, eyecare, fear, health care, medicine, philosophy, senior citizens